I have realized that I'm a loser today. U kno one thing alot of people don't really kno what I go through, I get held back by people I love and by people who love me. U kno just one day I wish that I could get some of the things that I want l, u kno I inch and pinch and try to fight off temptations but I always come up on the loseing side of things, I always have to give up things that I want for the temptations of material goods. I don't kno what the hell to do, I'm just a loser...what eles is there to say. I always go back to the ones that hurt me, the ones that I love always reject me I'm just stuck. The world is againts me at all times, it's like I'm the butt of a crule joke that somebody gets there jolies off to. Am I that sad. But I kno this though, once I get out of here no one is going to stop me, if I have to step on other people to get ahead or if lives have to be lost, I want a better life for me, I guess that's what I gotta do look out for number one cuz atleast I won't be betrade by myself

well were getting more snow again, and I'm stuck in the house...welcome to another exciting edition of the wide world edition of Jamie, with special guest stars too many to name at this time...so with out further adieu heresssssssssssssssssss....Jamie. welcome, welcome, welcome, everyone I'd just like to say hi to everyone in the audience and to everyone at home. I'd just like to just go over a couple of important things. first still majorly jobless i still got the one job but with all of the hrs cuts and the weather( more on that later). and i guess I'll take the blame for the job thing, but its hard to look for a job when u don't have a car to go to interviews and its real hard to buy a car with out money, so I'm caught lol. now on to the weather, its been bad. its snowed two Friday's in a row and its hurts cuz i cant go into work. i also have had to dig out a path to my aunts house and dig out (with alittle help) two drive ways. but other than that Ive been getting some gaming in. and a lot of people would think that it was great to do...no its boring. not for the first time but gaming isn't is the cards like its use to be. and its not like I'm getting out of gaming its just i need something else to do, so Ive been slowly cleaning my room and it looks OK for right now. theres so much more that i need to do lol. but i have moved my stack of mangas to the other side of the room, which is always good took some DVD cases and put them in a trunk that Michelle gave me ( those are going up into the attic later on). and that's the end for right now looks like I'll catch up on that super bowl right now lol

-later days...